anything but pancakes

"...the first time
my father caught me
masturbating,"

she said,
"I kept doing it
because I didn't know
I wasn't supposed to.

I was a little girl
just doing something that
felt
funny.

My sister used to
rub herself
on the
armrest of the couch
and say she was just
riding the horsey.

I would
stick my fingers down there and
tickle myself.

But that one day,
as my father walked
in the door,
I thought,

ooooh
it would be nice
if he spanked me
right now.

and then he told me to stop doing that
and I asked doing what?
and he pointed at my crotch
and yelled That!
Stop doing that!
I asked why
and he stared at me
shaking all over
with an angry face

and he yelled
Because you're not supposed to do that!
and then he stormed out of the room.

it just made me really confused.
but I never stopped doing it, I just
waited until they were asleep.

I'd forgotten all about that
until right now."

then she shrugged
pulled the covers off her
got out of bed and,
while walking to the bathroom,
asked what I wanted for breakfast.

"Eggs, maybe,"
I said,

"but not pancakes.
anything but pancakes."

by Eddie Kilowatt